My friend sent me this. It's a humorous proposal for a new reality show. I laughed out loud and thought... that WOULD make a good show. Maybe if the writer's strike goes on much longer, they'll have to look into this...
NEXT 'SURVIVOR' TV SERIES
Six married men will be dropped on an island with one car and 3 kids each for six weeks.
Each kid will play two sports and either take music or dance classes.
There is no fast food.
Each man must take care of his 3 kids; keep his assigned house clean, correct all homework, complete science projects, cook, do laundry, and pay a list of 'pretend' bills with not enough money.
In addition, each man will have to budget in money for groceries each week.
Each man must remember the birthdays of all their friends and relatives, and send cards out on time.
Each man must also take each child to a doctor's appointment, a dentist appointment and a haircut appointment . He must make one unscheduled and inconvenient visit per child to the Urgent Care (weekend, evening, on a holiday or right when they're about to leave for vacation).
He must also make cookies or cupcakes for a social function.
Each man will be responsible for decorating his own assigned house, planting flowers outside and keeping it presentable at all times.
The men will only have access to television when the kids are asleep and all chores are done.
Each father will be required to know all of the words to every song that comes on TV and the name of each and every character on cartoons.
Each man will have to make an Indian hut model with six toothpicks, a tortilla and one marker; and get a 4 year old to eat a serving of peas.
Each man must adorn himself with jewelry, wear uncomfortable yet stylish shoes, keep their nails polished and eyebrows groomed. The men must try to get through each day without snot, spit-up or barf on their clothing.
During one of the six weeks, the men will have to endure severe abdominal cramps, backaches, and have extreme, unexplained mood swings but never once complain or slow down from other duties.
They must attend weekly school meetings, church, and find time at least once to spend the afternoon at the park or a similar setting.
He will need to read a book to the children each night without falling asleep, and then feed them, dress them, brush their teeth and comb their hair each morning by 7:00. They must leave the home with no food on their face or clothes.
A test will be given at the end of the six weeks, and each father will be required to know all of the following information: each child's birthday, height, weight, shoe size, clothes size and doctor's name.Also the child's weight at birth, length, time of birth, and length of labor, each child's favorite color, middle name, favorite snack, favorite song, favorite drink, favorite toy, biggest fear and what they want to be when they grow up.
They must clean up after their sick children at 2:00 a.m. and then spend the remainder of the day tending to that child and waiting on them hand and foot until they are better.
They must have a loving, age-appropriate reply to, 'You're not the boss of me.'
The kids vote them off the island based on performance.The last man wins only if...he still has enough energy to be intimate with his spouse at a moment's notice.
What do you think? Would it be a hit???
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6 comments:
Wow!!! That would be so.... Funny!!!!!
And so are the women back home:
- working 8+ hours a day at a job where they aren't paid what they are worth
- commuting over 2 hours to work in rush hour traffic and getting cell phone calls from the spouse saying, "when are you getting home"
- taking out the garbage
- killing all the really ugly spiders, moths and various insects
- handling all the various telemarketers
- programmming the VCR, alarm clocks, changing the batteries in the smoke alarms
- balancing the checkbook
- repairing the broken household items, clearing the drains in the clogged sinks
- doing the yard work, mowing, edging and trimming trees
- maintaining the cars, changing the oil, washing and filling with gas
- handling the Jehovah's Witnesses, Mormons or local traveling sales people or teen challenge person selling magazine subscriptions
- handing out the 'corporal' punishments and/or enforcing the rules that have been set forth by the other spouse
- being the 'bad guy' to the old, wait till your father get's home line...
- learning all the recent scores and trades from the top 10 sporting teams so you don't look foolish at the office.
- working out so that you don't end up dead from a heart attack or impotent from prostate cancer
come on now - each of us has a role in raising our children. Some nurture, others are providers...
By the way - according to my wife - I must be a freak because I can do and have done all the list. So, I accept the challenge! Where do I sign up?
O.K. Rick, I get your point, but can you wear unconfortable, yet stylish shoes? Do you get your eyebrows waxed?
Even so, I think you would be a shoe-in for this competition.
I have to admit that Rick is the exception here, but the real interesting and funny part for me is that I also do about three-quarters of Rick's list on top of the original list, which is why my brain is turning to mush now days. Too much going on in there. ;)
Oh, I don't think I should even really get started on poor Rick, but, I have to agree with Sharon, I do most of the stuff on his list, plus the original. I guess Dawn is just lucky!
Ok... I must admit - at one point in my life... of which I am NOT proud of.. I have had my eybrows 'tweezed' - but about the uncomfortable, but stylish shoes... well, does having to wear cowboy boots count?
And really, you know how I feel about shoes - I am no David Trotter, but I would suffer if it made the 'outfit'.
The only area I would struggle would be "During one of the six weeks, the men will have to endure severe abdominal cramps, backaches, and have extreme, unexplained mood swings but never once complain or slow down from other duties."
You got me there...
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